Getting Laid on the Internet
One of the greatest things about internet message boards is that people are the greatest lovers of all-time. There are people that will say they have had better at any posting of a supermodel picture in any thread. Of course everyone on the internet has a 10 inch wang, or larger, and looks like Brad Pitt. Until gps fleet tracking is availabe for forum users, nobody can track you down and see if you are really what you are. Some fat pimply loser who actually spends 16 hours a day online trying to convince other that you are indeed a pimp because it makes you actually feel like you aren’t a complete loser in real life.
The best stories of ePenis syndrome come from sex tales. Those that tell you they have a girlfriend that is hotter than Adriana Lima:
Certainly this is true because they are on the internet. My ePenis is 14 inches in fact. Much larger than the average ePenis. Adriana Lima is like the girl I turned down for the 100th time for a date because I really want nothing to do with someone stalking me all the time I am so damn hot. She has nothing on the women I actually do date. I almost can’t even stomach looking at her compared to the women I bed. 3 at a time mind you. Any less than 3 and I have a hard time climaxing. It just isn’t exciting enough for me. I am so used to having a whole harem of women at my disposal that I just can’t get off with only one or even two. Hell…if I woke up and WASN’T getting oral pleasure just off opening my eyes, I’d think I had just fallen into a strange 3rd dimension where ugly people ruled the world.
Yes. I am an ePimp. Bow before my immense ePenis, and my incredibly handsome, and chiseled features.
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